We all want to live that G-rated life; to act like children in Disneyland. But the truth is we are all darkness. And the brilliance and magnificence all lie in that darkness; in secretly hating your parents; in secretly envying your friends or secretly judging your partner. Darkness in lusting over people that you are not supposed to. In advocating social norms and bringing down anyone that defies them while wanting to do exactly what they did. Darkness in persecuting the sinner and craving them. Your darkness is in admiring the despot. Your darkness is in hating yourself and judging it. Your darkness is believing you are underserving and wishing that everyone else is undeserving too. In wanting more out of your life, in wanting less for others, in celebrating chaos, in loving harm, in wishing for a taste of that sinful pleasure.
We are all small and petty and we hate ourselves and that’s our misery. We hate our reflection in others, in their faults, sins, short comings but most of all; their liberation. We hate their freedom and courage to be themselves; with no limitations, with no concern for others. We hate their might and gut and it reminds us of what small, despicable beings we are.
We all want a taste of what’s beyond the allowed; some of us deny it, some acknowledge it, some go for it, but almost all censor it. We deem the ones who don’t; stray.